Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Adoption Crisis

"Crisis"...I hear this word A LOT in the profession in which I work. I deal with people in crisis on an almost daily basis. So when someone referred to our situation as an "adoption crisis," I was taken aback. Not because I think it's an inaccurate description, but because I really haven't felt like I've been in crisis. Please don't misunderstand me here; this has probably been the hardest thing I've endured in a very long time, if not ever in my life. For those of you who aren't familiar with our journey, here's the synopsis:

-Called to adopt last year (July '09)
-Committed to a little boy named Sergey
-Get to the end of the adoption paperwork process, send dossier to Sergey's country, and while waiting on travel date, lose the referral because one of Sergey's family members objected to the adoption.
-Heartbroken, decide to continue the adoption journey and commit to another child.
-Commit to Kirill
-Redo some paperwork & re-send dossier to different region of the same country.
-mother sends her child back to his home country, resulting in possible suspensions of all U.S. adoptions of children from that country.

So here we are. This is the second time we've been at the point of just waiting on a travel date to meet our child and something has happened. Both times we've literally been days away from receiving the news we've been anticipating for almost a year: "Mr. and Mrs. Davis, your travel appointment is (insert date here)." Both times we have had the rug pulled out from underneath us. We have felt frustrated, angry, devastated, heartbroken, confused, shocked, and every other upsetting emotion you can imagine. But through it all, you know what we have felt more than anything?

PEACE

I'm not saying we haven't cried or been upset. I've cried out in frustration to God louder than ever. But that's the beauty of God's peace...the more I have cried out, the more peace he has given me about the situation. It is totally him too. Because if you know me well, you probably wouldn't describe me as a peaceful person. Impatient, easily frustrated, and stressed...yes. Peaceful...no. Outspoken, opinionated, selfish...yes. Peaceful...no. So you see, it could ONLY BE GOD giving me this kind of peace because it is totally out of my nature if I'm relying on me. But this situation has become so much bigger than me so I've had to just give it completely to God. In return, he has given me the peace that passes understanding.

This song is one of the ways that God has blessed me with peace. I have probably heard it a hundred times before but had never listened to the words at all. As I was driving home from work one afternoon, it came on the radio. I had been praying just moments before for God to please give me peace about our adoption. As I listed to the words, tears began to flow and I knew that God was giving me a message. I hope that it will encourage you as well.


8 comments:

  1. That was beautiful! I am praying for you and Kirill !

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  2. Beautiful! While my situation has been different than yours, here it is more than a year later and we are still waiting! The last couple of weeks I have been struggling [to put it mildly]. The last couple of nights I have cried myself to sleep while speaking with God. Today, I am more at peace with the waiting than I have been the last 2 weeks, not a perfect peace, but so much better than I have been. He cares, He listens, He heals, and HE WILL BRING MY GIRLS HOME!

    Praying for you as you continue on your journey to your sweet little boy! Can't wait to see him home!

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  3. oh and yes, I definitely had tears flowing with this song.... the video, the song.... so beautiful!

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  4. we too have waited a year and had so many huge ups and downs. I thought we were past all that until on Monday. The reason the USCIS sent the check back was because the paperwork had been rejected! Our adoption agency had it redone and Fedexed by the end of the day- our officer told us not to wait to get the packet in the mail. it could take weeks. Just redo it and get it mailed. I am praying the third time is a charm. Everything seems to be coming together "ust so". I have learned complete trust.

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  5. God gives us what we need to get through every situation. Praise God that He gave you a new perspective. This is a beautiful song! I am confident that once your adoption journey is complete, you will look back at this experience and say it was worth it all! Praying for continued peace during this time of waiting. Another great song, "I'm Waiting" from the Fireproof soundtrack.

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  6. Just wondering if you have seen the State Dept webpage concerning Russia adoptions? Maybe they can help?

    http://jccany.convio.net/site/R?i=mTqaFzg9_bO5OP4ahh__gA..

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  7. Praying for you guys...

    In a sermon at our church last week, our pracher was talking about hearing God's call for your life. He said that God's calling will be the only time you will feel a burden and a peace all at the same time. I think you are living that right now!

    Love you.

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  8. Tes, I hadn't read this in several days and I listened to this song just now and it was just what I needed to hear tonight when I had so many questions doubts fears etc running through my mind. I'm so glad God has brought us back together in a way through these two very different trials we are walking through.

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